Failure can be a big stumbling block in creating the life of our dreams. Not failure in itself, but our fear of failure, or the way we beat ourselves up for past failures.
I've posted before about imperfection as a form of R&D. Here's a great article on the Wisdom of Failure. It begins by distinguishing between failure and identity...
Failure is an action, not an identity. It is not who we are; rather it is an event or situation, or it is related to a choice we have made. Yet, most of us, at some point in our lives, have worn failure as an identity.
Have you ever failed at something and painted yourself in light of that failure, even temporarily? "I can't do anything right." "Who am I trying to kid?" "I can't do this."
The author stresses that we are not our failures.
In order to let it go, we need to be able to separate our sense of self from the actions or choices that led to the failure. My partner is fond of saying, there is no failure, only feedback. How do we turn failure into feedback?The first thing we need to do is step back from the failure so we can get a different perspective of it. We need to review it almost as if it had happened to someone else. What happened? What led to what happened? What decisions were made? Based on what information? Did we pay attention to all the information – the analytical, intellectual and the intuitive or gut reactions?
In the end, it's not about failing, it's what you do with what you've learned.
We wouldn’t be who we are today without our failure experiences. They help define us; sometimes they show us exactly what we’re made of. Bottom line is, we make the best decisions we can, with the knowledge, resources and self-awareness we have available to us at the time. It’s easy to see, with 20/20 hindsight, we should have done something different. The question now becomes: what do you do with the 20/20 hindsight to change patterns or increase your knowledge going forward so that "failure" becomes the wisdom from which you grow and create success.
Curt Rosengren
Passion Catalyst SM
I think that being somewhat young has helped me overcome any fear of failure as I still have a deep understanding that there is so much more to learn. The author is right in saying that their is no such thing as failure. The only time a failure hurts us is when we do not learn from it and continue to repeat the same mistakes over and over again.
Our company has hit some bumps since our inception, but we have learned from each one and would not change a thing. Our company grows as we continue to grow.
Posted by: Paul Scrivens | July 06, 2004 at 06:40 PM
Hi great blog I really enjoy reading this article
The only time a failure hurts us is when we do not learn from it and continue to repeat the same mistakes over and over again.Im totally agree with you
Posted by: Viagra Prices | November 10, 2009 at 02:11 PM